Wednesday, October 24, 2001

Catching up with that old gang of mine

Maybe it's the sudden unsure footing on which we all find ourselves emotionally these days, when planes crash, building crumble and little, if anything, seems permanent anymore. Maybe it's just the annual turn in the cycle of death and rebirth that attends autumn, intensified on this particular circle by some unseen or, at least, unheeded force. Maybe my moon is in a bad house or my stars are falling (astrology is not my long suit).

It certainly isn't wedding bells, as the old refrain goes, but something sure seems to be breaking up that old gang of mine.

The Actor finally resurfaced. I got a call late Monday night from him, sounding only mildly contrite for bringing me and all of his old friends to the edge of worry and leaving us perched there for weeks. Frankly, among my motivations for visiting New York — his last known whereabouts — last week was an optimistic hope I'd bump into him on the street.

Why, he'd been in London, he enthused! Having a perfectly wonderful time, doing a part in a small film, taking in the sights, filling up the nights, luxuriating in the city's life while we all, figuratively at least, sat by the phones here and chewed our nails. Seems he was swept off his feet (no mean task, considering whatever substance he can claim is not in his performances but in his frame) by another devotee of the craft and followed his new romance across the Atlantic.

By the sound of it, he's going to ride out the remaining few weeks on his Chicago place and flee across the ocean for good. Ordinarily, a new adventure with the opportunity for both romance and career advancement would have me cooing encouragement to him right and left. Instead, the abruptness of his decision — coupled with his self-imposed communications silence these past many weeks — left me able only to mutter a brief "I'll be thinking good thoughts for you" and hang up the phone, wondering who is this person I've known for over a decade. Who was he?

People change, I know. Craig certainly has. After he broke it off with The Actor, he dipped his toe into the "being single" pond and, apparently deciding the water was just fine, cannonballed right on in. Our at-least-bi-weekly movie dates have gone by the wayside and I receive periodic updates — although never from him directly — suggesting that the boy I'd once praised as a level-headed, temperate influence on his older boyfriend has become...oh, let's not put too fine a point on this — Craig's having a slut-rific life these days.

I bumped into him a couple of weekend's back, while Danny and I were lifting a beer at Clementine's. He was wearing a leather harness and sporting two more piercings than I remembered him having or wanting when he first came into our fold. (He hinted at a third, available for private viewing, which I declined.) With his crop-cut and cocky swagger, I must say he wore it all pretty well. "Let's catch a movie sometime, eh?" I said.

"Yeah," he shot back, "let's do that", and slipped along the bar, draping his arm across the back of a man I recognized as one of Jason's regular "clients" from a few years back.

The Twins both got pink-slipped recently, early casualties in a spate of retail layoffs hereabout. That's bad timing all around, since the duo who were once my favorite circuit fixtures were just beginning to get serious about adopting a kid. They bought a house back in June, too; the inaugural post-decorating party was set for next weekend but now no one's heart is really in it.

And the Giant Queen, of all people, is talking about retirement, world travel and a migration to San Francisco. "Honey!" exulted Jeff when that little bit of news came out. "That's wonderful! They'll just eat you right up out there." Cupping his hand over the phone's mouthpiece, he turned to me and muttered sepulchrally, "He's over 50. They'll eat him alive."

Jeff? Well, Jeff's life is getting ready to change too, but he has no idea how and I, for the moment, have been sworn to secrecy. I have a role to play here, and an opportunity to knit together what bits remain from the gang.